Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Why are we so angry?

I have been listening to the news over the last couple of days........Phew.
Abusive relationships are on an increase and the laws to keep us safe are inadequate. Safeguards for children involved in abusive families are less robust than necessary.
Police seem reluctant, social workers under trained or under resourced and the BIG Society seems to have a blind spot.
The abuser seems to be able to continue with societal collusion.
So what is the underlying issue that can bring about an abusive relationship? What emotions and feelings of self esteem keep both the abuser and the abused in the relationship?
The over riding emotion is ANGER.....in fact RAGE is probably a better description.
But what does the Rage seek to hide? What is it that the abuser constantly has to battle against?
I suggest that a deep seated fear of who we believe we are is somewhere near the mark. We may have been told at an early age that we are not good enough, not worthy of the unconditional love every child has a right to receive.
Children are not born bad.
We, through parenting, help to cultivate the 'bad' child. Either with or without awareness.
Abusers can be of either gender.
Men make up the majority.
Male anger/ rage is a serious societal issue and 'things need to change'.
I work as a counselor with an interest in all things male. I want to engage with men at a heart and soul level to work to ease that rage. We as men have a responsibility to change this aspect of ourselves. The women in our lives deserve better as do the children.
How do we do this?
Where do we do this?
Watch this space