Sunday, 16 March 2014

The toxicity of immaturity

Quite a heavy title and I am sorry if it is off putting but when adults conduct themselves as children in the world of parenting then the outcome can be pretty toxic for all involved.

Sexual abuse, Physical abuse, Psychological abuse, Rage can all be psychologically immature responses in life. I appreciate that there may also be mental health issues which will also impact and hopefully help can be found for those with additional mental health issues.

As I have shared baby rage has had a lasting effect on me throughout my life in terms of poor relationships with lovers, family and friends. Not engaging as an adult until recently has cost me dearly.
In fact I believe that had I not done some deep emotional work to clear my baby rage, as I now know it to be, then my current relationship would have ended.

So, how do we interrupt this ancestral cycle of immature parenting?

Somehow as a society we have to acknowledge the issue and introduce emotional intelligence as a subject into education. Self awareness, mindfulness, and other therapeutic interventions need to be given space and time.
I realise that this idea may not have an  immediate and obvious impact and be measurable in terms of educational qualifications but with time and commitment we may well help to create a more wholesome society.
The idea of a Big Society is a sound one if it weren't based on capitalistic ideals. It all about relationships both with ourselves and others.

There is an organisation...Place 2  Be which is heavily involved in school therapeutic services. I believe we need more involvement both through professionals and also the elders of our society. Where are the wise men and women who can help to heal the past and shape the future?

We as the grownups need to begin to live life in the now and work to shed the impact of our past which shades the way we live.